I have always loathed and hated those cliche romantic sayings that have the potential to make you throw up all over the place. You know the ones you hear in movies like the Notebook...the ones that sound so cheesy it's impossible to believe they have any validity. "It feels so right when we're together," "I can't explain it, but we just have a connection," "Wow, even our signs are compatible" "I feel complete when I'm with you." Despite my disdain for phrases such as these, in the last couple of days I've found myself saying them in my head...I even said one of them out loud! It's funny how when you least expect it someone can come along and throw your whole world for a loop. I went on a first date with the guy of the hour, and (vomit alert) we just clicked...fit...seemed so in sync. I had a wonderful time, we had great conversation, and he made me feel wanted and desired...a way I haven't felt since I dated the "athlete." This is something I didn't see happening anytime soon. I even put off going out with him for the longest time because I wasn't sure I was remotely interested. I finally decided to just take a chance and go with it...I mean it's a free meal and what did I have to lose? It just goes to show that sometimes you really have no idea what's best for you. Now, after a couple dates here comes the stomach flip...the butterflies...the exhilaration from things being so new. However, along with the stomach flip comes the fear...the kind of fear that gives you goose bumps in 100 degree weather, and makes you want to run and hide under your bed. The only bone chilling fear that can come from really liking someone. You're scared you're going to get hurt, afraid that they won't feel the same way about you that you feel for them, fearful that it's all just a game...you know the regular thought consuming reservations. Last time I let someone in, let down my guard, showed my vulnerable skin...I was left out in the freezing cold, mauled by wild Alaskan dogs, thrown in a rushing river, and blown to five billion pieces. A little dramatic I know, but it's how I felt...destroyed. You can only imagine the hesitation I feel to take that kind of risk again. So, my solution: to not think, and just live...to have fun, and not get distracted with what could happen...to be IN the moment.
Bottom Line: What's life without a little risk? BORING. Anything can happen, good or bad, but the key is to live everyday with as little regrets as possible...shut up and enjoy that stomach flip!
